Poem

I guess this blog is more about me than anything else. For many of you who know me personally, you know I haven't had an easy life, but then again who has. Many of he bad things that happened to me were of no fault of my own, and some of the bad things happened because of poor choices that I have made. But because of that mixture of experiences, I have become the person I am today. If you were to ask people who are close to me, they might tell you that, "Gina is a happy person, she always making us laugh," " She loves her kids" " She is a good friend, always there when you need her", but to others, who don't know what I have been through, well the response might be a little different, they might use such words to describe me as, cold, stand offish, or guarded. I sometimes have to stand back and take a look at myself and wonder if I am any of those things that people may see. I guess I may seem a little guarded at times, it used to be real hard for me to trust people but even more than that I had a harder time forgiving people for the wrongs they had committed towards me. But a person once told me that forgiveness is giving up all hope that I can somehow change the past. WOW what an eye opener, I mean the past is gone, I cant get it back so why carry around the baggage of all those painful memories>>>? So I live today with kinda that same moto...why stress about yesterday when it is gone??? and why worry about tomorrow when it isn't even here? So I live for today, simple as that.

Well I am rambling on, but I wanted to share this poem with you all, please leave your thoughts on this or any comments :)

Little Girl With Inner Strength and Forgiveness...

I don't know how 'you' do it I am told

how you allow forgiveness to show,

I must start at the beginning where it all began

my fellow friend

as my heart I hope to extend

with sincerity that won't end

Inner strength and resolve hides deep

to those that must learn to seek

from the hurtful pains caused by a creep

or shall I say a manipulative leech

To me it all fits

I have to sadly admit

when sexually abused used like a wife

you hold deep a lot of inner-strife

Not knowing where to turn

makes that pain continuously burn

as time goes on

you hear that familiar happy song

Of learning to let go

you must in order to grow

strength is what you learned

from the bad memories that burned

In your heart you try hard not to dwell

you realize being closed like a clamshell

your heart won't propel

as you "think" all you can do

Is sink further into your once living hell

as few happy memories begin to gel

your anxiety is quelled

as you hear the tiny voice of little belle

Calling you back home

a restless heart

no longer needing to roam

the coast is clear, you were never alone.